Saturday, December 02, 2006
Mood: Dehydrated -_______-"
Listening to: Anna Molly - Incubus
Stupendously, being in this relationship teaches me to be more accomodating with people. And in this case, with people I love. Maybe I expected too much from people and when they cannot reach those expectations, I will be extremely vexed. Now, I just keep quiet, forgive them and give them another chance. And what more, just forget about it, (Tasha style, "buat bodoh je sudah") Hahaha.
I've been thinking. Very affectingly whether I should get pink strips for my hair. Hmm, extentions? Haha, maybe. Well, because there will be 2 very important family event, i can't simply show off my rebellious state of mind on the day of those event. But i sometimes wonder, if my cousins can do it why cant i? -________-" even my late mother supports me when my father disagree whether i could dye or highlight. Well oh well, maybe i should wait till i'm older and see if people at home gives a shit.
I don't know why my father gets broke really fast. It's making me feel that i should not depend on him on my expenses for something important such as new spectacles or contacts (which i'm suppose to be getting them today, but im broke) and school stuff which i have not got them yet.
And speaking of which he starts to spend the money more on himself (the fact he's having an affair now), maybe i should get them before he finishes his. Though I may have 3 siblings, 2 who have a stable job and another just for the time being, i cannot depend on them either. My sister, will never give me a single cent. She only buys me things and that also depends on her mood which is always so sulky every single minute. My eldest brother, who only gives a shit about his girlfriend and will only help when my grandmother mentions about me needing his care or whatever shit. My 2nd elder brother, who ever cares? So who else can i depend on? Myself, unfortunately. And when my grandmother see me buying clothes, she will nagnagnag -_______-" She says the clothes i buy are, uhm, not suitable? Like hello, at least i wear hoodie to cover my boopies. Yeah but exceptionally not my ass : D And i want that black jeans from Mango! I dont care. I'm getting it tomorrow.
So yes. I guess maybe this is really the whole meaning of my fate. I just have to look after myself, at this age with ugly mongstars. Can i lead a decent life? That's all i wish for.
AND I WANT TO KILL MY BROTHER FOR NOT PAYING THE INTERNET BILLS AND MY HANDPHONE BILL! I think he can pay them with his pay and why the fuck must he delay? God, I just don't understand ADULTS these days -_______-" So unreasonable. Which makes me think they are getting more and more stupid. Selfish, stupid, and exceptionally boring! I want a more outgoing family. Haish, not my fate, so ..
W H A T E V E R !
I'm not going for tomorrow's gig. Broke and it's like E V E R Y O N E ' S not going. So I guess i'll just hang out with the bf. Gosh, i'm just in heaven in his arms. Ahaha, sounds like converge song.
Anyways, I'm growing! Adult tooth growing in my gums and it's like ouch. Sorry, but RANDOM FACT : Fatin grows very slow, despite the height. Hahah!
Tasha's birthday outing. I hope it will be gerek. I mean, I just want her to be happy. See her happy makes me go HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA. God, i miss her kuchings. Huhu!
(3:39 PM)
